Wednesday, Feb. 5, 2020
Today, remembering my drinking days, I was my own judge, jury and executioner. In giving my all to whiskey, I judged myself to be unworthy of anything better, of feeling anything good. I deemed myself deserving of all which active alcoholism inflicted on me - emptiness, loneliness, self-destruction, anger, selfishness, desperation, fear. And I executed the judgment that I should die as I lived - then. But a lifeline was thrown my way, and it led me to recovery. Now, as a recovering alcoholic, I've surrendered the roles of judge, jury and executioner to the only authority that can impose judgment. And because I respect that authority, this day I will not play with my recovery by yielding it to anyone or anything. Today, I am worthy of more by the grace of God and AA. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M., 2020
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