May 31, 2013 - Step by Step

Step by Step

Friday, May 31, 2013

"...(D)eep down in every man, woman and child is the fundamental idea of God. It may be obscured by calamity, by pomp, by worship of other things, but in some form or other it is there. For faith in a Power greater than ourselves, and miraculous demonstrations of that power in human lives, are facts as old as man himself." - Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, Ch 4 ("We Agnostics"), p 55.

Today, if I expect AA to work for me, I must expect myself to work with it, and I must knock down the wall that separates me from the Power stronger than myself to begin my recovery from alcoholism. If I am struggling or even rejecting the possibility of such a Power, let me read and embrace these words from the Big Book and accept on blind faith the hope that somewhere inside me is a "fundamental idea of God." He, God, need not be a religious entity but a spiritual one, and a "spiritual awakening," even if it is a basic change in my psyche or character, is required if I am to achieve any kind of quality recovery. Today, I must put aside any resistance and open myself to the idea of a Power stronger than myself so that I can earn the benefits of recovery. If alcohol is stronger than me, I have to believe and hope that a force stronger than alcohol can restore me. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M., 2013

May 31, 2013 - Twenty-Four Hours a Day

Twenty-Four Hours a Day
Friday, May 31, 2013

AA Thought for the Day
I shall not wait to be drafted for service to AA. I shall volunteer. I shall be loyal in my attendance, generous in my giving, kind in my criticism, creative in my suggestions, loving in my attitudes. I shall give to AA my interest, my enthusiasm, my devotion and, most of all, myself.

Do I also accept this as my AA credo?

Meditation for the Day
Prayer is of many kinds but, of whatever kind, prayer is the linking up of the soul and mind to God. So, if prayer is only a glance of faith, a look or a word of love or just a feeling of confidence in the goodness and purpose in the universe, still the result of that prayer is added strength to meet all temptations and to overcome them. Even if no supplication is expressed, all the supply of strength that is necessary is secured because the soul, being linked and united to God, receives from Him all spiritual help needed. The soul, when in its human body, still needs the things belonging to its heavenly habitation.

Prayer for the Day
I pray that I may be taught how to pray. I pray that I may be linked through prayer to the mind and will of God.

Hazelden Foundation

May 31, 2013 - A Day at a Time

A Day at a Time
Friday, May 31, 2013

Reflection for the Day
Giving love is a fulfillment in itself. It must not matter whether love is returned or not. If I give love only to get a response on my terms, my love is cancelled out by my motives. If I have the capacity to give love, then any return I get for it is a special bonus. It is through giving love freely and without expectation of return, that we find ourselves and build ourselves spiritually.

Have I begun to believe, in the words of Goethe, that, "Love does not dominate; it cultivates ...?"

Today I Pray
May I, the inveterate people-pleaser and approval-seeker, know that the only real love does not ask for love back. May God be patient as I try to practice this principle. May I rid myself of pride that throws itself in the way of love. May I discard my silly cat-and-mouse games that have no place in real love.

Today I Will Remember
I will not give love to get love.

Hazelden Foundation

May 31, 2013 - The Eye Opener

The Eye Opener
Friday, May 31, 2013

For a person to attempt to live apart from this world is as useless as for a drop of water to live apart from the ocean. God put everything in this world, and He takes nothing out. To endeavor to withdraw from the world's activities is another way of fooling yourself. We are an influence for good or evil regardless of our attempts to hide from society at large.

When a rock falls from a cliff into the sea, it is not merely that the land is one rock less, it means the contour of the whole continent has changed. However, it is still a part of God's Universe whether it can be seen by man or not.

Hazelden Foundation

May 31, 2013 - Today's Gift from Hazelden

Friday, May 31, 2013

Today's thought from Hazelden is:

Sharing our sobriety
We cannot give away something we don't have. And since the people closest to us forced us to see our inadequacies, our inability to love, most of us resented them. Although aware of the problem, we hated having it shown to us regularly. We were empty and scared. And there was no hope in sight, so we blamed our problems on those around us.

But by coming into the program things change: First we get hope; then we get strength and experience to share with other alcoholics and nonalcoholics. We learn that in order to keep what we've been given so freely, we must give it away.

Do I share my sobriety with others?

Higher Power, help me be ever aware of the source of all the good things I've been given, and show me each day how to share them with others.

From the book:

Day by Day - Second Edition by Anonymous

Day by Day © 1974, 1998 by Hazelden Foundation

May 30, 2013 - Step by Step

Step by Step

Thursday, May 30, 2013 

"The old pattern reasserted itself, but it was no longer once every six months. The intervals grew shorter. The binges were longer. They were harder to get off. I wasn't the type that could taper off. I had to stop cold. My last binge followed the previous one by two weeks. I had just come off a good one, and I went back on to the next one." - Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, "They Lost Nearly All," Ch 3 ("Desperation Drinking"), p 514. 

Today, let me guard against the passage of time and my last drunk from fading the memory of what my drinking days were really like - pure desperation. If it is true that the best predictor of my future is my past conduct, I cannot afford to "romanticize" my drinking, that it was "fun" and that it didn't rip a path of destruction through myself and others. God grant me the honesty and wisdom to remember the desperation that finally pushed me to ask for help after I exhausted all the denial, justifications and rationalizations. Let me understand and accept that desperation is all the awaits me again if I am not honest with myself in remembering what active alcoholism is truly like. Today, the desperation that is always there to greet me again can wait. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M., 2013

May 30, 2013 - Twenty-Four Hours a Day

Twenty-Four Hours a Day
Thursday, May 30, 2013

AA Thought for the Day
I am part of AA, one among many, but I am one. I need the AA principles for the development of the buried life within me. AA may be human in its organization, but it is Divine in its purpose. The purpose is to point men toward God and a better life. Participating in the privilege of the movement, I shall share in the responsibilities, taking it upon myself to carry my fair share of the load, not grudgingly but joyfully. To the extent that I fail in my responsibilities, AA fails. To the extent that I succeed, AA succeeds.

Do I accept this as my AA credo?

Meditation for the Day
"Praise the Lord." What does praising God mean? It means being grateful for all the wonderful things in the universe and for all the blessings in your life. So praise God by being grateful and humble. Praise of this kind has more power to vanquish evil than has mere resignation. The truly grateful and humble person who is always praising God is not tempted to do wrong. You will have a feeling of security because you know that fundamentally all is well. So look up to God and praise Him.

Prayer for the Day
I pray that I may be grateful for all my blessings. I pray that I may be humble because I know that I do not deserve them.

Hazelden Foundation

May 30, 2013 - A Day at a Time

A Day at a Time
Thursday, May 30, 2013

Reflection for the Day
Since I've been in The Program, I've learned to redefine love. I've come to understand, for example, that sometimes it's necessary to place love ahead of indiscriminate "factual honesty." No longer, under the guise of "perfect honesty" can I cruelly and unnecessarily hurt others. Today, I always must ask myself, "What's the best and most loving thing I can do?"

Have I begun to sow the seeds of love in my daily living?

Today I Pray
May God, in His love, show me how to be loving. May I first sense the feelings of love and caring within me and then find ways to show those feelings. May I remember how many times I cut myself off from relationships because I did not know how either to let myself feel love or to show what I did feel.

Today I Will Remember
When I feel love, I will be loving.

Hazelden Foundation

May 30, 2013 - The Eye Opener

The Eye Opener
Thursday, May 30, 2013

We are all familiar with that class of people who have a drinking problem; they know they have it and they know that they can do nothing about it themselves. They also know that we had a similar problem and that we did something about it; their own eyes bear testimony to that effect - yet they refuse to take the message we bring them. They have ears, yet they will not hear. It is not our purpose to sell them a bill of goods. Our message is only for those who want it. They aren't ready yet, so conserve your efforts for those who are hungry for what we have to give.

Hazelden Foundation

May 30, 2013 - Today's Gift from Hazelden

Thursday, May 30, 2013

Today's thought from Hazelden is:
Go and wake up your luck.
 -- Persian proverb

We've been given recovery. For this, we're lucky. And we're grateful. Now it's up to us. We must accept our choices. When we're afraid, do we choose to be alone? Or do we choose to go to an extra meeting? When we're not honest, do we keep it secret? Or do we admit it and try to be more honest? No matter what we choose, we're responsible for that choice. Through choices, we either make our program strong or weak.

We can choose to be lucky. Or we can choose not to be. The choice is ours. Our addiction robbed us of choice. It taught us to blame others. Now we see ourselves as responsible.
Prayer for the Day
Higher Power, help me to choose wisely. Help me remember I'm responsible for my choices.
Today's ActionToday I'll work at being responsible for my choices. I'll see myself as one of the lucky ones.

From the book:

Keep It Simple by Anonymous

Keep It Simple © 1989 by Hazelden Foundation

May 29, 2013 - Step by Step

Step by Step

Wednesday, May 29, 2013 

"Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity." - Step Two 

Today, whether a newcomer or veteran of the Program, if the term Higher Power discourages me because my faith has been ravaged by alcohol or the less than serene episodes of sobriety, let me re-read and understand the literal interpretation of Step Two. We are not asked or mandated by this Step to believe, but "come to believe" in the possibility of a Higher Power. If I shrug off the possibility of some being stronger and greater than myself, I need only look to why I came to AA in the first place: by doing that, I also reached out for the possibility that some help that I need desperately exists. By the same measure, if I cannot yet grasp the concept of a stronger power, let me believe that Step Two is telling me that coming to believe in and accept a Power greater than myself is a dynamic process, one that requires ongoing change. Just as I did not become sober after my last drink and probably needed weeks, months or longer to move from being dry to being sober, so it goes with developing an understanding of the principles of all Twelve Steps. Today, I will not give up if I do not  believe in that Higher Power; instead, I will proceed with the promise of Step Two that I will one day find my Higher Power. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M., 2013

May 29, 2013 - Twenty-Four Hours a Day

Twenty-Four Hours a Day
Wednesday, May 29, 2013

AA Thought for the Day
We who have learned to put our drink problem in God's hands can help others to do so. We can be used as a connection between an alcoholic's need and God's supply of strength. We in Alcoholics Anonymous can be uniquely useful just because we have the misfortune or fortune to be alcoholics ourselves. Do I want to be a uniquely useful person?

Will I use my own greatest defeat and failure and sickness as a weapon to help others?

Meditation for the Day
I will try to help others. I will try not to let a day pass without reaching out an arm of love to someone. Each day I will try to do something to lift another human being out of the sea of discouragements into which he or she has fallen. My helping hand is needed to raise the helpless to courage, to strength, to faith, to health. In my own gratitude, I will turn and help other alcoholics with the burden that is pressing too heavily upon them.

Prayer for the Day
I pray that I may be used by God to lighten many burdens. I pray that many souls may be helped through my efforts.

Hazelden Foundation

May 29, 2013 - A Day at a Time

A Day at a Time
Wednesday, May 29, 2013

Reflection for the Day
When we first reached The Program and for the first time in our lives stood among people who seemed to understand, the sense of belonging was exhilarating. We felt that the problem of isolation had been solved. We soon discovered, however, that while we weren't alone any more, in a social sense, we still suffered many of the old pangs of anxious apartness. Until we had talked with complete candor of our conflicts and had listened to someone else do the same thing, we still didn't belong. Step Five was the answer.

Have I found through the Fifth Step the beginning of true kinship with my fellows and God?

Today I Pray
May God help me learn to share myself, my attributes and my failings, not just as I take the Fifth Step but in a continuing give-and-take process with my friends. May I cultivate an attitude of openness and honesty with others, now that I have begun to be honest with myself. May I remember who I used to be - the child in a game of hide-and-seek, who hid so well that nobody could find her/him and everyone gave up trying and went home.

Today I Will Remember
I will be open to friendship.

Hazelden Foundation

May 29, 2013 - The Eye Opener

The Eye Opener
Wednesday, May 29, 2013

Life has been hard on us, but most of it was made hard by ourselves. The hard life, however, taught us much: it strengthened our muscles; it broadened our experiences. We are better men because of it. We have known much of hunger, pain, defeat, mental anguish, despair and shame. Only the good survived this ordeal, and we can alleviate the sufferings of the world all the better because we have suffered also.

God was not punishing us ...He was conditioning us.

Hazelden Foundation

May 29, 2013 - Today's Gift from Hazelden

Wednesday, May 29, 2013

Today's thought from Hazelden is:

Accepting those things we cannot change frees us.

It's so easy to get caught up in other people's lives. Assuming that we know what's best for them seems so natural. Many of us have excelled at being caretakers, but it's time to back off and let our loved ones fend for themselves. That means letting them make their own decisions and live with their own consequences.

We can't change other people. Certainly we have made others feel guilty enough so that they have given in and done things our way. And we have won many power struggles. But ultimately we can't claim ownership of anyone else's mind, and we aren't the stewards of anyone else's life. We may feel diminished by our lack of control initially, but in time we will love the freedom of living only our own lives. The extra time we'll have and the peace we'll know will comfort us.

I will experience many moments of relief and peace when I let others be their own stewards.

From the book:

A Life of My Own by Karen Casey

A Life of My Own by Karen Casey. © 1993 by Hazelden Foundation

May 28, 2013 - Step by Step

Step by Step

Tuesday, May 28, 2013

Today, I realize that my moral inventory in the Fourth and amends of the Eighth are not confined to my wrongs of commission but also apply to my wrongful acts of omission. With that awakening, my Fourth and Eighth Steps, hopefully, will be more honest. My moral inventory and amends I have tried have focused on things I have done or said, but they have not included my wrongs of having not said or done what I should have. Maybe I neglected or refused to return love or support that someone showed me in my darkest days, or maybe I didn't answer someone's call for help for whatever reason. Today, I return to my Fourth and Eighth Steps to decide if I owe restitution not for what I did, but for what I didn't do. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M., 2013

May 28, 2013 - Twenty-Four Hours a Day

Twenty-Four Hours a Day
Tuesday, May 28, 2013

AA Thought for the Day
In AA, we learn that since we are alcoholics we can be uniquely useful people. That is, we can help other alcoholics when perhaps somebody who has not had our experience with drinking could not help them. That makes us uniquely useful. The AA's are a unique group of people because they have taken their own greatest defeat and failure and sickness and used it as a means of helping others. We who have been through the same thing are the ones who can best help other alcoholics.

Do I believe that I can be uniquely useful?

Meditation for the Day
I should try to practice the presence of God. I can feel that He is with me and near me, protecting and strengthening me always. In spite of every difficulty, every trial, every failure, the presence of God suffices. Just to believe that He is near me brings strength and peace. I should try to live as though God were beside me. I cannot see Him because I was not made with the ability to see Him else there were no room for faith. But I can feel His spirit with me.

Prayer for the Day
I pray that I may try to practice the presence of God. I pray that by doing so I may never feel alone or helpless again.

Hazelden Foundation

May 28, 2013 - A Day at a Time

A Day at a Time
Tuesday, May 28, 2013

Reflection for the Day
We've all had times when we felt alienated, when it seemed we had nowhere to turn and no one to turn to. When we don't know which way to turn, when there seems to be no one to help us, even then we're not alone or without help - the presence of God is always with us. When we need strength or courage or comfort, God is there with us as the help we need. Even before we turn to God, His love reaches out to us; His loving Spirit in us hears our cry and answers us.

Do I truly believe that I no longer need be alone?

Today I Pray
May I never be alone, even in a place by myself, if I take time to talk to my Higher Power. May He be my companion, my joy, my ever-present help in trouble. May the knowledge of His constant presence fill me with calm, so that I will not fear either the solitude of my own room or alienation in a roomful of people.

Today I Will Remember
Listen for the presence of God.

Hazelden Foundation

May 28, 2013 - The Eye Opener

The Eye Opener
Tuesday, May 28, 2013

Love is as necessary to a human being as sunshine is to a plant. Without it, the soul of man withers, shrivels and dies. Fortunate is the man who has love given to him, but even more fortunate is he who earns it. The only way to earn love is to love. Thou shalt love thy God with all thy heart and thy neighbor as thyself.

He who hoards love shall lose it, but he who scatters love about him as he moves through life finds that it takes root and surrounds him on every side.

Hazelden Foundation

May 28, 2013 - Today's Gift from Hazelden

Tuesday, May 28, 2013

Today's thought from Hazelden is:

I can hear music...sweet, sweet music.
 -- Brian Wilson

We often find it helpful to think about the role music has played in our lives. Sometimes, it has been a problem for us - time spent listening to loud, blaring music was a time of physical and emotional isolation, usually under the influence of drugs.

In recovery we may find ourselves drawn to a different kind of music that speaks to our changing way of life. Perhaps it is more soothing or relaxing. Perhaps it is a new artist.

Whatever type of music we choose, we find it is much more than a pastime for us. It is an appreciation. Our favorite artists, our favorite songs - some never change, some do.

Our relationship with music is growing and changing. In recovery we find music engages our minds and relaxes our bodies in a new way. Music lifts our spirits, too. We are grateful that music is part of our life and that we now have a chance to think about it and perhaps even develop some new interests. Music is an excellent way to get to know other people; it helps us unwind after a hard day and adds a new dimension to our enjoyment of life.

Today I thank You for music. Help me to love and appreciate it even more now that I am sober.

From the book:

Body, Mind, and Spirit by Anonymous

Body, Mind, and Spirit © 1990 by Hazelden Foundation

May 27, 2013 - Step by Step

Step by Step

Monday, May 27, 2013 

Today, I have to give overdue appreciation to the spouse, companion, brothers and sisters, parents, children and friends who wanted to help me as I spiraled out of control but who I shut out, who were and are still there as I inch toward recovery. In being focused on my own recovery and working the Steps, I have probably been negligent to admit that the hell I put someone else through might have been worse than my own. And I have to acknowledge that they, too, have their own recoveries to work. Today, I will be grateful and offer to anyone who stayed with me a simple thank you and, to them, my superior amend is that, today, I can and will stay sober. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M., 2013

May 27, 2013 - Twenty-Four Hours a Day

Twenty-Four Hours a Day
Monday, May 27, 2013

AA Thought for the Day
In Twelfth-Step work, the fifth thing is continuance. Continuance means our staying with prospects after they have started on the new way of living. We must stick with them and not let them down. We must encourage them to go to meetings regularly for fellowship and help. They will learn that keeping sober is a lot easier in the fellowship of others who are trying to do the same thing. We must continue to help prospects by going to see them regularly or telephoning them or writing them so that they don't get out of touch with AA. Continuance means good sponsorship.

Do I care enough about other alcoholics to continue with them as long as necessary?

Meditation for the Day
Every strong and beautiful flower must have a strong root in the ground. It must send a root down so that it may be rooted and grounded while at the same time it sends a shoot up to be the flower that shall gladden the world. Both growths are necessary. Without a strong root, it would soon wither. The higher the growth upward, the deeper must be the rooting. My life cannot flower into success and helpfulness until it is rooted in a strong faith, or unless it feels deeply secure in the goodness and purpose of the universe.

Prayer for the Day
I pray that my life may be deeply rooted in faith. I pray that I may feel deeply secure.

Hazelden Foundation

May 27, 2013 - A Day at a Time

A Day at a Time
Monday, May 27, 2013

Reflection for the Day
When I have only myself to talk to, the conversation gets sort of one-sided. Trying to talk myself out of a drink or a pill or a "small wager" or just one chocolate eclair is sort of like trying self-hypnosis. It simply doesn't work; most of the time, it's about as effective as trying to talk myself out of a case of diarrhea. When my heart is heavy and my resistance low, I can always find some comfort in sharing with a true and understanding friend in The Program.

Do I know who my friends are?

Today I Pray
May I be convinced that, as part of God's master plan, we were put here to help each other. May I be as open about asking for help as I am ready to give it, no matter how long I have been in The Program. May the experiences of countless others be enough to prove to me that "talking myself out of it" seldom works, that the mutual bolstering that comes from sharing with a friend usually does.

Today I Will Remember
When I ask for help, I am helping.

Hazelden Foundation

May 27, 2013 - The Eye Opener

The Eye Opener
Monday, May 27, 2013

To follow the letter of the law is not enough. You can be moral without difficulty in "solitary."

Do not let your morality be simply restraining and abstaining. Be constructive in your goodness. Be good for something.

Hazelden Foundation

May 27, 2013 - Today's Gift from Hazelden

Monday, May 27, 2013

Today's thought from Hazelden is:

Love consists in this, that two solitudes protect and touch and greet each other. -- Rainer Maria Rilke
For a relationship to be healthy and fulfilling, each of us must respect the other. "Two solitudes" is exactly what we are, and we will never be one, no matter how close we become. It may feel like that at times, but we always remain separate persons with our own thoughts, feelings, dreams, and interests.

When we love one another, we allow each other to be who we are, to have our own lives, for it is out of those separate lives that we bring strength and energy and life into our relationships.

We are meant to honor the differences between us. Often these differences lead to squabbles, but when we recognize that each of us is necessary to the union we have created, we create a better one, far superior to the sum of its parts.

From the book:

Today's Gift by Anonymous

Today's Gift © 1985, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation

May 26, 2013 - Step by Step

Step by Step
Sunday, May 26, 2013

" ...We realized that the people who wronged us were perhaps spiritually sick. Though we did not like their symptoms and the way these disturbed us, they, like ourselves, were sick too. We asked God to help us show them the same tolerance, pity and patience that we would cheerfully grant a sick friend." - Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, Ch 5, pp 66-7.

Today, the words of the Big Book strike a profound chord as they apply to letting go or at least to handling resentments and other ill feelings I might harbor for someone else: I cannot justify feeling anger and anything else bad against anyone else if I hope or expect no one to have such feelings toward me. If I claim spiritual disease as the root of my own misconduct, I have to afford the same to those who have offended me. While I might never grow to the point that I like those who I believe have offended me, rightfully or not, I need to at least work toward purging plans of revenge or hopes that something bad befalls someone else. Today, as I hope no one wishes me ill, I cannot justify hoping the worst for someone else. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M., 2013