Saturday, June 11, 2022
Today’s Gift from Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation
You may drive out Nature with a pitchfork, yet she will hurry back. — Horace
Birds don’t chirp because they want to please their listeners. They chirp because they’re birds, and they do it whether anyone listens or not. Like them, we are what we are — many of our best qualities are results of our individual natures, and the influence of other people has little to do with it.
Jane drinks because she’s an alcoholic, not because her husband is a nag. Kim is affectionate with her husband because she’s affectionate with everyone she loves. Kim is a toucher and a patter — that’s her nature. Kevin enjoys home building and repair projects. Kevin’s family may or may not deserve or appreciate his skill — but that’s not why he’s doing it.
We have little power to change anyone’s nature — even our own. It is a delusion to imagine that if others love us they would change or would do things the way we want them to. No one can manipulate a lion or chirp like a bird. Fundamental orientations to life are not amenable to manipulation.
As I grow in self-acceptance, I am learning to accept other people as they are.
Hazelden Foundation
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