A blog for getting on with life clean and sober ...and for learning what's going on in the world
Saturday, January 31, 2015
The rise of 'mostly straight' dudes and why their sex lives are more complicated than you think
Daily Dot: Jan. 31, 2015 - The rise of 'mostly straight' dudes—why men's sex lives are more complicated than you think
People mag confirms Olympian Bruce Jenner transitioning to female
Bruce Jenner |
Jan. 31, 2015 - Today's Gift from Hazelden
The Serenity Prayer |
Saturday, Jan. 31, 2015
Today's thought from the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation is:
Reflection for the Day
Since I came to The Program, I've become increasingly aware of the Serenity Prayer. I see it on literature covers, the walls of meeting rooms, and in the homes of new-found friends. "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference." Do I understand the Serenity Prayer? Do I believe in its power and repeat it often? Is it becoming easier for me to accept the things I cannot change?
Today I Pray
God grant that the words of the Serenity Prayer never become mechanical for me or lose their meaning in the lulling rhythms of repetition. I pray that these words will continue to take on new depths of significance as I fit life's realities to them. I trust that I may find the solutions I need in this prayer, which, in its simplicity, encompasses all of life's situations.
Today I Will Remember
Share the prayer.
Reflection for the Day
Since I came to The Program, I've become increasingly aware of the Serenity Prayer. I see it on literature covers, the walls of meeting rooms, and in the homes of new-found friends. "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference." Do I understand the Serenity Prayer? Do I believe in its power and repeat it often? Is it becoming easier for me to accept the things I cannot change?
Today I Pray
God grant that the words of the Serenity Prayer never become mechanical for me or lose their meaning in the lulling rhythms of repetition. I pray that these words will continue to take on new depths of significance as I fit life's realities to them. I trust that I may find the solutions I need in this prayer, which, in its simplicity, encompasses all of life's situations.
Today I Will Remember
Share the prayer.
You are reading from the book:
A Day at a Time © 1989 by Hazelden Foundation
Jan. 31, 2015 - Step by Step
The Serenity Prayer |
Step by Step
Saturday, Jan. 31, 2015
Today, I will live just for today. I cannot nor do I want to forget yesterday for it has lessons to carry into tomorrow. Nor do I want to be so preoccupied with tomorrow that I neglect today for I may miss some unintended good that someone or something has to offer. I can plan for tomorrow going to church and doing whatever routine chore needs done, but I cannot fret over tomorrow and dread what demons or challenges my yesterdays programmed me to expect. But that programming from my yesterdays was dictated by a whiskey bottle and, God granting, there is no whiskey bottle in my today. I therefore cannot fear that what I do today will poison my tomorrow. My life, my sobriety, my hopes, my dreams, my fears, my recovery - all are today. Today is all I have, and I must not be lax in strengthening it to make tomorrow's today the promise of something good. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M., 2015
Jan. 31, 2015 - Twenty-Four Hours a Day
The Serenity Prayer |
Twenty-Four Hours a Day
Saturday, Jan. 31, 2015
AA Thought for the Day
Drinking cuts you off from God. No matter how you were brought up, no matter what your religion is, no matter if you say you believe in God, nevertheless you build up a wall between you and God by your drinking. You know you're not living the way God wants you to live. As a result, you have that terrible remorse. When you come into AA, you begin to get right with other people and with God. A sober life is a happy life because, by giving up drinking, we've got rid of our loneliness and remorse.
Do I have real fellowship with other people and with God?
Meditation for the Day
I believe that all sacrifice and all suffering is of value to me. When I am in pain, I am being tested. Can I trust God, no matter how low I feel? Can I say, "Thy will be done," no matter how much I am defeated? If I can, my faith is real and practical. It works in bad times as well as in good times. The Divine Will is working in a way that is beyond my finite mind to understand, but I can still trust in it.
Prayer for the Day
I pray that I may take my suffering in my stride. I pray that I may accept pain and defeat as part of God's plan for my spiritual growth.
Hazelden Foundation
Jan. 31, 2015 - A Day at a Time
The Serenity Prayer |
A Day at a Time
Saturday, Jan. 31, 2015
Reflection for the Day
One of the most constructive things I can do is to learn to listen to myself and get in touch with my true feelings. For years, I tuned myself out, going along, instead, with what others felt and said. Even today, it sometimes seems that they have it all together, while I'm still stumbling about. Thankfully, I'm beginning to understand that people-pleasing takes many forms. Slowly but steadily, I've also begun to realize that it's possible for me to change my old patterns.
Will I encourage myself to tune in to the real me? Will I listen carefully to my own inner voice with the expectation that I'll hear some wonderful things?
Today I Pray
I pray that I may respect myself enough to listen to my real feelings, those emotions which for so long I refused to hear or name or own, which festered in me like a poison. May I know that I need to stop often, look at my feelings, listen to the inner me.
Today I Will Remember
I will own my feelings.
Hazelden Foundation
Jan. 31, 2015 - The Eye Opener
The Serenity Prayer |
The Eye Opener
Saturday, Jan. 31, 2015
Nothing great was ever achieved without overcoming great obstacles, and no hero of history deserves more acclaim than those who were triumphant over self. But do not let us swell up too much with pride. If we are honest, we know that with our character-weakened souls, with our "fogbound" brains, we could accomplish nothing of ourselves. It was only when we, in our desperate surrender, threw our lives and our wills into His keeping that He, in His mercy, removed the obstacle. Unknown, even to ourselves, there must have slept in us that Faith of a mustard seed, that can remove mountains.
Hazelden Foundation
Friday, January 30, 2015
Commentary: How the Mormons punked the press with a pro-gay guise
Mormon Elder Dallin Oakes |
Virginia House panel shoots down anti-gay 'conscience clause' bill
Bob Marshall |
India outlaws homosexuality, but it's easier being transgender there than in the U.S.
India has outlawed homosexuality. But it’s better to be transgender there than in the U.S. - The Washington Post
Seven things sobriety made me realize: Year One
The Good Men Project: Jan. 30, 2015 - 7 Things Sobriety Made Me Realize: Year One -
Jan. 30, 2015 - Today's Gift from Hazelden
The Serenity Prayer |
Friday, Jan. 30, 2015
Today's thought from the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation is:
Nothing ventured, nothing gained
We pray for "courage to change the things we can.'' Change requires giving up familiar old ways to try something new. Even though the old ways brought us pain, they were known. Changing them for new ones feels risky; it could lead to pleasure . . . or to even more pain.
But if we don't try, we'll never know whether we can handle a new job, go back to school, work out a new relationship, or breathe new life into an old one. To try something new, we have to be willing to take risks and be vulnerable. We have to accept the responsibility and the consequences if our venture does not proceed as we had hoped it would.
Perhaps our addiction was a way of avoiding risk. Rather than take the chance of failing at something we wanted to do or being rejected by someone to whom we offered our friendship, we focused on our addiction. Are we ready, now, to take risks for something we really want?
Today, I can take a small risk in the interest of enriching my life.
Nothing ventured, nothing gained
We pray for "courage to change the things we can.'' Change requires giving up familiar old ways to try something new. Even though the old ways brought us pain, they were known. Changing them for new ones feels risky; it could lead to pleasure . . . or to even more pain.
But if we don't try, we'll never know whether we can handle a new job, go back to school, work out a new relationship, or breathe new life into an old one. To try something new, we have to be willing to take risks and be vulnerable. We have to accept the responsibility and the consequences if our venture does not proceed as we had hoped it would.
Perhaps our addiction was a way of avoiding risk. Rather than take the chance of failing at something we wanted to do or being rejected by someone to whom we offered our friendship, we focused on our addiction. Are we ready, now, to take risks for something we really want?
Today, I can take a small risk in the interest of enriching my life.
You are reading from the book:
Inner Harvest by Elisabeth L. © 1990 by Hazelden Foundation
Jan. 30, 2015 - Step by Step
The Serenity Prayer |
Step by Step
Friday, Jan. 30, 2015
Today, I work for progress instead of perfection. And, in recognizing the difference, I might learn patience over impatience not only with others, but with myself. Progress requires that I focus on just this day while perfection forces me to look to the unrealistic and unattainable goals beyond today. And by preoccupying myself with tomorrow, I am likely to neglect something today - and that failure will likely sabotage any tomorrow I might have. Tomorrow will hold nothing good if I neglect today. Today, then, will be focused on one thing at a time and first things first. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M., 2015
Jan. 30, 2015 - Twenty-Four Hours a Day
The Serenity Prayer |
Friday, Jan. 30, 2015
AA Thought for the Day
A drinking life isn't a happy life. Drinking cuts you off from other people and from God. One of the worst things about drinking is the loneliness. And one of the best things about AA is the fellowship. Drinking cuts you off from other people, at least from the people who really matter to you, your family, your co-workers and your real friends. No matter how much you love them, you build up a wall between you and them by your drinking. You're cut off from any real companionship with them. As a result, you're terribly lonely.
Have I got rid of my loneliness?
Meditation for the Day
I will sometimes go aside into a quiet place of retreat with God. In that place, I will find restoration and healing and power. I will plan quiet times now and then, times when I will commune with God and arise rested and refreshed to carry on the work which God has given me to do. I know that God will never give me a load greater than I can bear. It is in serenity and peace that all true success lies.
Prayer for the Day
I pray that I may strengthen my inner life, so that I may find serenity. I pray that my soul may be restored in quietness and peace.
Hazelden Foundation
Jan. 30, 2015 - A Day at a Time
The Serenity Prayer |
Friday, Jan. 30, 2015
Reflection for the Day
Have I gained freedom simply because one day I was weak and the next day I became suddenly strong? Have I changed from the helpless and hopeless person I once seemed to be simply by resolving, "from now on, things will be different ...?" Is the fact that I am more comfortable today than ever before the result of my own willpower? Can I take credit for pulling myself up by my own bootstraps? I know better, for I sought refuge in a Power greater than myself - a Power which is still beyond my ability to visualize.
Do I consider the change in my life a miracle far beyond the workings of any human power?
Today I Pray
As the days of sobriety lengthen, and the moment of decision becomes farther behind me, may I never lose sight of the Power that changed my life. May I remember that my sobriety is an ongoing miracle, not just a once-in-a-lifetime transformation.
Today I Will Remember
Life is an ongoing miracle.
Hazelden Foundation
Jan. 30, 2015 - The Eye Opener
The Serenity Prayer |
The Eye Opener
Friday, Jan. 30, 2015
After several years on the Program, we still have to guard against rationalizing. When it comes to selling ourselves a bill of goods, we are tops. Our drinking was most always occasioned by a "good reason," or so we thought; the real reason - the fact that we were alcoholics and therefore compulsive drinkers - never occurred to us. A good reason can always be found for our actions, but the real reason is frequently obscure. Lord, teach us to know the difference.
Hazelden Foundation
After several years on the Program, we still have to guard against rationalizing. When it comes to selling ourselves a bill of goods, we are tops. Our drinking was most always occasioned by a "good reason," or so we thought; the real reason - the fact that we were alcoholics and therefore compulsive drinkers - never occurred to us. A good reason can always be found for our actions, but the real reason is frequently obscure. Lord, teach us to know the difference.
Hazelden Foundation
Thursday, January 29, 2015
Text of Southern Poverty Law Center's ethics complaint against Alabama's chief justice
Southern Poverty Law Center: Jan. 29, 2015 - media.al.com/news_impact/other/Read the SPLC's complaint against Roy Moore.pdf
Civil rights watchdog group lodges ethics complaint against Alabama's chief justice
Alabama Chief Justice Roy Moore |
With preemptive strikes, states renew efforts to stop same-sex marriage
CreditRogelio V. Solis/Associated Press |
Jan. 29, 2015 - Today's Gift from Hazelden
The Serenity Prayer |
Thursday, Jan. 29, 2015
Today's thought from the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation is:
Nothing is so bad that relapse won't make it worse.
-- Anonymous
The stories we hear in meetings often shock us. It seems hard to believe that some members could have harmed themselves in such ways. We hear about arrests, bankruptcies, loss of family and home, lost jobs, violence, jail, physical injury – the list goes on. Most of us said to ourselves, "I never was that bad. Maybe I don't really belong here."
Our sponsors and fellow members quickly straightened us out. We were comparing our histories with other members. We were told to identify with the stories, not compare. Some of us had been lucky that worse things hadn't happened to us while we were using. We were reminded those things hadn't happened to us "yet." If we relapsed, the "yets" were waiting.
Today I'll remember to identify, not compare. I don't want to relapse and go through THE YETS.
Nothing is so bad that relapse won't make it worse.
-- Anonymous
The stories we hear in meetings often shock us. It seems hard to believe that some members could have harmed themselves in such ways. We hear about arrests, bankruptcies, loss of family and home, lost jobs, violence, jail, physical injury – the list goes on. Most of us said to ourselves, "I never was that bad. Maybe I don't really belong here."
Our sponsors and fellow members quickly straightened us out. We were comparing our histories with other members. We were told to identify with the stories, not compare. Some of us had been lucky that worse things hadn't happened to us while we were using. We were reminded those things hadn't happened to us "yet." If we relapsed, the "yets" were waiting.
Today I'll remember to identify, not compare. I don't want to relapse and go through THE YETS.
You are reading from the book:
Easy Does It © 1999 by Hazelden Foundation
Jan. 29, 2015 - Step by Step
The Serenity Prayer |
Step by Step
Thursday, Jan. 29, 2015
Today, I will harness the gifts of the Program - courage, strength, hope, wisdom of my Higher Power, compassion, passion - and work them for another person's whose needs are far more urgent and desperate than mine. I will not accept that other person's intellect or any others barriers as an excuse to permit his voice from being heard. Today, MY voice will be HIS, and his desperate struggle for help will no longer be his silent and lonely fight. And in helping this person who cannot help himself, I am driven by the knowledge that my Higher Power has sent this person to me and He will give me the knowledge to carry out His will. And, in the end, if I am effective in helping someone else, I will NOT accept congratulations save my ego being fueled. And, in advocating for someone else today, I won't have the time, I'll have no reason or excuse, to use or drink. I will be too busy carrying out the commandment of the Program - carrying the message. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M., 2015
Jan. 29, 2015 - Twenty-Four Hours a Day
The Serenity Prayer |
Thursday, Jan. 29, 2015
AA Thought for the Day
What a load wasting money puts on your shoulders! They say that members of AA have paid the highest initiation fee of any club members in the world, because we've wasted so much money on liquor. We'll never be able to figure out how much it was. We not only wasted our own money, but also the money we should have spent on our families. When you come into AA, that terrible load of wasted money falls off your shoulders. We alcoholics were getting round-shouldered from carrying all those loads that drinking put on our shoulders. But when we come into AA, we get a wonderful feeling of release and freedom.
Can I throw back my shoulders and look the whole world in the face again?
Meditation for the Day
I believe that the future is in the hands of God. He knows better than I what the future holds for me. I am not at the mercy of fate or buffeted about by life. I am being led in a very definite way, as I try to rebuild my life. I am the builder, but God is the architect. It is mine to build as best I can, under His guidance.
Prayer for the Day
I pray that I may depend on God, since He has planned my life. I pray that I may live my life as I believe God wants me to live it.
Hazelden Foundation
Jan. 29, 2015 - A Day at a Time
The Serenity Prayer |
Thursday, Jan. 29, 2015
Reflection for the Day
I used to imagine my life as a grotesque abstract painting; a montage of crises framed by end-upon-end catastrophies. My days all were grey and my thoughts grayer still. I was haunted by dread and nameless fears. I was filled with self-loathing. I had no idea who I was, what I was or why I was. I miss none of those feelings. Today, step by step, I am discovering myself and learning that I can be free to be me.
Am I grateful for my new life? Have I taken the time to thank God today for the fact that I am clean and sober - and alive?
Today I Pray
May calm come to me after the turmoil and nightmares of the past. As my fears and self-hatred dissipate, may the things of the spirit replace them. For in the spiritual world, as in the material world, there is no empty space. May I be filled with the spirit of my Higher Power.
Today I Will Remember
Morning scatters nightmares.
Hazelden Foundation
Jan. 29, 2015 - The Eye Opener
The Serenity Prayer |
Thursday, Jan. 29, 2015
On that awful day when the world had toppled about us, when all hope had departed and only wild desperation remained, then was the night darkest and nearest was the dawn. At this darkest hour, we "hit our bottom." There was no way to go but UP.
As dawn follows darkness in Nature's scheme, so darkness follows again in its turn. All things, save God, are transitory and what one day can bring, another day can take away. Let us not feel too secure in our sobriety, for darkness will come in the regular course of events, and we must be sure we have provided ourselves with the Light which will enable us to keep our footing on the slippery paths ahead.
Hazelden Foundation
Wednesday, January 28, 2015
'Cabaret' Oscar winner Joel Grey comes out as gay at age 82
Actor Joel Grey: Out of the closet at age 82 |
'Arrow' and 'Flash' creator aims to make TV superheroes 'look like America'
Pictured above: The Flash and Arrow producer and cocreator Greg Berlanti |
Alabama's chief justice says he won't comply with federal pro-gay marriage rulings
Alabama Chief Justice Roy Moore |
Mormons seek golden mean between LGBT rights and religious beliefs
CreditJim Urquhart/Reuters |
Jan. 28, 2015 - Today's Gift from Hazelden
The Serenity Prayer |
Wednesday, Jan. 28, 2015
Today's thought from the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation is:
When a, man leaves off believing in imaginary property, then only will he make use of his true property.
-- Leo Tolstoy
The original meaning of property is "belonging to the self." In this sense, land, houses, money, paintings, jewels, cars cannot be our property; they are all things, and we enjoy using them, but they have nothing to do with our selves.
What then is our true property? It's our moral and spiritual qualities; our capacity for love, our commitment to honesty. These are what make a difference in who we are. The difference between a lie and the truth is vastly greater than the difference between a bicycle and a Mercedes. When we appreciate this distinction, we can begin to develop our spiritual selves.
We all know that things can't make us happy; only a loving heart and a clear conscience can do that. Yet often we act as though the piling up of things was important in itself. A little reflection can restore our balance and return our imaginary property to its true place in our lives.
True property is what nothing can take away from me.
When a, man leaves off believing in imaginary property, then only will he make use of his true property.
-- Leo Tolstoy
The original meaning of property is "belonging to the self." In this sense, land, houses, money, paintings, jewels, cars cannot be our property; they are all things, and we enjoy using them, but they have nothing to do with our selves.
What then is our true property? It's our moral and spiritual qualities; our capacity for love, our commitment to honesty. These are what make a difference in who we are. The difference between a lie and the truth is vastly greater than the difference between a bicycle and a Mercedes. When we appreciate this distinction, we can begin to develop our spiritual selves.
We all know that things can't make us happy; only a loving heart and a clear conscience can do that. Yet often we act as though the piling up of things was important in itself. A little reflection can restore our balance and return our imaginary property to its true place in our lives.
True property is what nothing can take away from me.
You are reading from the book:
The Promise of a New Day by Karen Casey & Martha Vanceburg. © 1983, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation
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